The Origin of
Depression
“Depression
begins with disappointment. When disappointment festers in our soul, it leads
to discouragement.” Joyce Meyer
Man is inherently desirous of happiness. We all want to become happy;
without happiness, human existence may have become meaningless. Therefore, we
all want to avoid unhappiness, and
this self-defense mechanism may then develop into addictive habit patterns that
have ultimately become some of the characteristics of our individual
personality, affecting how we think.
In other words, to avoid unhappiness, we may subconsciously begin to "lose
contact with our realities" and thus become the persons we are not
supposed to be. Depression is a mental struggle against unhappiness that an
individual wishes to avoid, and in the process becomes a different person—a person with ever-changing moods and
temperaments.
To illustrate, a baby or toddler—even well-fed,
dry, and comfortable—may cry because he or she wants happiness, which is not
being separated from the parents; crying or screaming is the only self-defense
mechanism against being separated and feeling unhappy. As that baby or toddler
continues to grow, that normal child
will ultimately learn the reality that to be separated from the parents is just
a normal and necessary part and parcel of life and maturity.
However, the mental and emotional growth and
maturity of that same child may not be consistent with his or her physical
growth and mental maturity, and this inconsistency or disparity may
subsequently lead to many mental and emotional problems later in life, such as
recklessly driving a car, engaging promiscuously in sex, taking drugs or
addicting to alcohol. If the mental and emotional problems are not properly and
fully addressed and resolved, that same adolescent turning into a young adult
may continue to develop more problems, such as compulsive gambling or shopping
sprees. As that same individual continues to grow and mature, there may be many
other problems that crop up along his or her life journey, including problems
in career, marriage, family, health, money, and among many others. All these
life problems and challenges may continue to create more behavioral patterns,
which are only the manifestations of that individual's desperate struggle
against the unhappiness associated with emotional, mental, and physical
problems; they are just the self-defense addictive behaviors of that individual
striving desperately to overcome depression. In other words, that individual
simply wants to avoid un-happiness
resulting from the many life problems and challenges encountered.
Unattainable
Happiness
"The greatest
happiness is to know the source of unhappiness." Fyodor Dostoevsky
Depression is no more than a personal struggle
against unattainable happiness, which is the essence of life and living.
Therefore, almost everybody is always in quest of happiness. Sadly, to many,
the quest for happiness is forever unreachable—just like a carrot-and-stick in
front of a mule; the more pain inflicted on the mule by the stick: the more
desire the mule demonstrates to reach out for the forever unattainable carrot
in front. In many ways, a depressed individual is just like that mule with
self-inflicted pain, which is the depression—the more unhappy that individual
feels, the more depressed that individual will become, and the longer that
vicious cycle of depression will continue, only plunging that depressed
individual deeper into a fathomless black hole of despair and hopelessness.
Depression is no more than a mental manifestation of the forever unattainable
happiness that an individual strives to seek.
But why is human happiness so elusively and
evasively unreachable and unattainable? The answer is, surprisingly, quite
simple: happiness has to do with one’s perceptions of life experiences, and
thus the thinking mind plays a pivotal role in that respect. That is to say,
human happiness and the human mind are inter-related; without profound human
wisdom, the pursuit of happiness is like wandering in the wilderness without a
compass and a road map. Indeed, true human wisdom holds the key to opening the
door to understanding true human happiness.
Given the close connection between depression
and happiness, understanding true human happiness may help a depressed
individual overcome his or her depression.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
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